That’s not because ‘negative emotion’ blocks our desire. It’s because our emotion is an utterly reliable indicator of what we’re thinking.
If we’re thinking “oh no, money is scarce and I don’t know where the rent is coming from” it makes us feel anxious or frustrated. If we’re thinking “money finds its way to me no matter what, and supports my every need” then we feel pretty darn good.
From a brain science perspective, our thoughts and beliefs create the filters in our brains which allow (or block) our ability to perceive opportunities and the fulfillment of our desires. A thought such as “money is scarce” makes it harder for us to see abundance in our lives, and that literally hides opportunities from us.
From an esoteric perspective, if what we’re thinking – the story we’re telling ourselves – feels good, it means it’s close to the truth which our Higher Self knows. If what we’re thinking feels bad, that’s our big clue that it’s lie.
For example, ‘I am unlovable’ feels horrible not because it is true, but because it is a big fat hairy lie. Our Higher Self (call it spirit, intuition, inner wisdom, soul, the divine spark, Source, the cosmos or even God) knows that we are love. It cannot therefore contemplate the possibility that we are anything but lovable. The pain we feel from that thought is the pain of being closed off from our Higher Self.
It is possible to pivot instantly from despair to hope by changing a thought, but the truth is that – especially when we’re dealing with something long-entrenched, or swimming against the mainstream – it can feel like a struggle. We need to baby-step our way there.
And therein lies the sweetness of relief.
If our emotions are simply a navigation system, we can use relief like a game of ‘hot and cold’ to figure out whether we’re getting closer or further away from allowing our desires in.
Brrr, that’s cold, no, not there, keep moving. Ah, that’s better, a tiny bit lukewarm now. Yes, you’re getting warmer, warmer…. OOH, you’re on fire! You’re incandescent, you found it!!
Next time you feel bad about a topic, seek out a thought which brings relief. That can mean finding a better thought about the topic where you’ve been feeling bad, or it can mean focusing on a different topic altogether. It can mean taking a big step back and looking at the topic from a broader perspective. Or it can even mean going super-broad and finding a general thought – as long as it brings relief.
Relief is not an emotion like anger or joy or fear or hope. It doesn’t have a place of its own on the emotional journey from despair to joy. We can feel it at any point along that path. And that’s because it ALWAYS feels good, no matter where you’re starting out.
Anger feels awful, unless we’re coming to it from hopeless despair and victimhood. In that case, anger feels empowering and liberating. It feels like relief.
Hope feels like relief when we’re coming from anger. It’s lighter and less intense and has a beautiful glow we can bask in.
Joyful appreciation feels like relief when all we could manage before was hope, because hope carries a seed of doubt within and appreciation doesn’t.
Relief is emotional litmus paper.
Best of all, it’s simple.
You don’t have to name the emotion you’re feeling, all you have to do is find the thought that brings relief. Settle into the new emotion, whatever it is, and then reach for more relief. Step by step, back to love and appreciation.
If relief is a struggle right now, or it’s sticky around a particular subject, this is a perfect time to hire me. Especially if you’ve been stuck for a while. Please don’t let much more time go by before you find relief!